Solitude: loving your own company

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I’ve always heard people talk about how much it is important to give time to ourselves. To be alone and let the silence take charge of our minds and hearts. But I was never like this. I could never think of myself sitting somewhere all alone sipping a cup of coffee while I go to beautiful places with my thoughts. I was much different earlier than I am now.  I’ve always thrived off the energy of others and derived most of my happiness from the people around me. I’ve always needed to be around others.
But as I grew up, I somehow learned to be more comfortable with my own company. I started to feel content while enjoying my evening tea  sitting in my balcony and listening to the noises made by children playing In the park or the birds chirping or maybe just listening to the evening prayers along with the chanting of bells coming from the temple near my house. The experience is always new. I learn new things about myself and others. And I’ve also learned that finding comfort in our own company is not at all easy. We always  need our friends to come along with us to go to that new cafe which  just opened around the corner, and even if we are alone in a place full of strangers, we are constantly thinking about what these “strange group of non existent people” might be thinking.Basically, I’ve concluded that our constant need for the company of  others means we are not comfortable with The company of ourselves. To be truly comfortable in being all alone comes with practice and patience.

Think about it, though; we are literally never alone. Even if there is physically no one around you, you probably have at least two forms of technology in your immediate vicinity that can connect you to the outside world in just about any form of virtual communication.We’ve become dependent on our ability to talk to anyone at any time By avoiding loneliness, we’re preventing ourselves from being confident on our own.
It’s really hard to find your own voice when you can hear (or see) anyone else’s at any given moment.

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To master this art, start with being alone in a room. Just you and your silence.
Let your thoughts take the lead. You might be upset because of a recent fight with a loved one or you might feel joy since you just came home after playing with puppies living in your street. Let everything be. Start doing this for 5-10 mins then move on slowly. Eventually, you wouldn’t even notice and you’ll be sitting in that cafe which is just around corner sipping your favourite latte while photograph is playing in the background.

Sometimes being alone does not always mean going through your thoughts and ideas. It also means listening to your own mind, or not listening to anything at all.

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Find peace in the silence. Read that book you always wanted to read or write that poem about your long lost love, or maybe just look around and see what’s happening and trust me you’ll be able to look past things. You will be able to see that tree dancing to the music of the winds or maybe you might hear the  darkest secrets of the world as we know it.

Trust me, I’ve tried.

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14 thoughts on “Solitude: loving your own company

  1. This is amazing 🙂
    Very well written…I’ll surely try this !
    I hope it brings out something better in me as a person.
    Looking forward to more such write ups.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. This is literally so deep that when i tried falling for this piece of art i kept falling.
    That cafe incident has happened with me so many times.
    This is great help !!
    Thank you

    Liked by 1 person

  3. This is a great post. I’ve gone through a similar journey as you, meaning that when I was younger I was uncomfortable being by myself. My lack of confidence even manifested in the need to constantly be the center of attention. Sure it made me popular, but there was nothing healthy about it.

    I’m now much more comfortable just being with myself, quietly writing in a cafe or just doing whatever. And I’m much more content than I was when I was the center of attention.

    Liked by 1 person

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